SGL Café

Did Chris Brown show Bow Wow his winky? / Stupid Tweets / Reflections

This post is deeper than it sounds. Hang out for the reflections. Maybe dissing your fans or "groupies" in a tweet is cool these days. Charlie Sheen's unhinged rants sent his twitter following through the roof. But no one is expecting anything profound from Mr. Mercury Surfboard. They just want to witness the crash and burn of a star. That says a lot about human nature. Bow Wow dissing a groupie, probably while sitting right next to him or her, made me think he's a bit of a bastard. Did he think that groupie wouldn't see the tweet, and put two and two together? What kind of "groupie" wouldn't be following his tweets? Anyway ... The groupie diss was around the time Chris Brown flashed his somewhat impressive winky to the world (whoring himself for his forthcoming F.A.M.E. release). An apparently cranky Bow Wow was wrapping up his Underrated Tour in Europe, having very noisy nights because a hotel neighbor left him a snarky note. We'll get back to the note in a minute. On the music tip, here's a pretty awesome (and romantic) Chris Brown, Bow Wow, Pleasure P collabo. It sets a nice tone for this post. It was the below tweet that made me wonder, and admittedly read between lines. Okay, I'm a writer so my imagination runs amok sometimes. Maybe I'm just hungry for a black male rock star couple to paraphrase Keyshia Cole and say "F*ck it, this is us!" Maybe. But still I wondered the most unimportant things ever: Who was the first recipient of Chris Brown's winky pic? And did someone even get a live Skype show first? So ...when Bow tweeted -- Spoke to Breezy today, thats my bro. On life. Naturally my imagination projected romantic undertones. If Chris Brown sent me that pic I'd be his bro, too. Forever. Did they even discuss the picture? Maybe the wisdom of putting it out there in the first place? You gotta wonder. Okay you don't gotta, but you can. And many do. Some do even more. Back to the noise complaint Bow Wow received from a hotel neighbor in Room 905. It was the comments below the note (which Bow posted via Twitpic) that made me wonder about other things, and even re-think this post. SwaggerJackerr: You and Omarion must've been gettin it in again huh (pause) This Swagger person, according to his profile, is a motivational speaker and navy vet. Hmmm.... Why would a navy vet go to Bow's doorstep to piss on his porch? Are his sexual activities that important to him? But he's just one of many cyber stalkers with an obvious hard on for Shad Moss. KassieSassy123: he got it in di BATTY thats y he was making so much noise BATTY BOIII And this Kassie person is all over Bow's Twitpic posts, taunting him, calling him BATTY BOI everywhere. Then there's this ominous comment... ... below a sweet picture of Bow as baggage waiting to be picked up. I could run with that analogy (and objectify the sh*t out of him), but I won't. TheRoyalBaby: aawwww cute......I hope u die tomorrow u sick bastered [bastard?] This 'lovely young lady' [included to show not just DL black males hate on Shad], when not wishing death on Bow Wow, is a Justin Bieber fan. She probably stalks him, too. Is this all just the price of fame? Was Bow seriously suicidal awhile back when Raz B pulled him into the molestation mess? Are we driving our young celebs to the brink? More specially, do we cannibalize the young black males we suspect might be closeted and drive them further in? Yes. We do. But there are no solutions. No fixes. This post began as a 'Stupid Tweet' post but turned into something else. Because we'll always be fascinated. We'll always want to know more. We'll always speculate, or like was done here, scrounge between twitter lines for something salacious. And the crazies will always stalk and torment (hopefully only from afar). And yes, that is the price of fame. You're on stage and the world is your critic, firing off loving and vile reviews in 140 characters or less. People should have their heads examined for wanting the FAME MONSTER in the first place. Note to Bow: Spike Lee said it best - "Always do the right thing". That covers how you treat groupies and that 'other stuff'. Some people want to see you crash and burn. But some of us want to see you soar. Stay strong. Note to Chris Brown: Stop showing your winky to the rest of us. It's tacky (and cruel). Note to Omarion: *See advice above.*

Wanna see Chris Brown's winky? Wait no more ....

Hey Chris, I already pre-ordered so you didn't have to show me your winky. But much appreciated. Yes, baby. Much. Ahhh.... there are no words. Well, maybe a few. This looks very real to me, and coincidentally F.A.M.E. drops on Mar. 22. Hmmmm.... Let's not even get into the subject of whoring oneself for FAME... Just be glad that some do. ;-) Now pull out of your dirty Chris fantasy (the one where he's rough sexin' you to the wall)... ... and listen to the romantic Chris below, ... from In My Zone 2 ... which many have slept on. It's been in heavy rotation around here for awhile. Njoy ... Also ... Check out this reaction to Chris' nudity. Priceless ...

When Thesaurus' attack! Annotated breakdown of Ricky Romance's 'fallaciloquent' apology to Chris Brown.

Did he just call Chris a big-eared Mexican bat? Ouch.

Apparently crazy-ass Raz B's equally crazy-ass brother Ricky Romance believes liberal use of $10 words no one understands is the way to get your point across. Either that or he borrowed Sarah Palin's speechwriter (who now has two people who've just made fools of themselves to his credit). In the (wink,wink) apology below for threatening Chris Brown during the twitter beef instigated by Raz B, Ricky's 'eloquence' warrants a ... girl, puh-leeeze! We'd pay to hear him pronounce a few of them without stuttering. Anyway, here is the hilarious apology below in white, offending words in red - and annotations in maroon. "I would like to extend my most sincere apologies to the elderly and youth of our nation for my sudden acrasial message of violence towards other individuals of unimportance."[The elderly don't know who you are, and the youth think you're whack.] **Acrasial** -- ill-mannered, ill-tempered. [ CRAZY would have worked just fine, and been more truthful.] I must eclaircise any misunderstandings that I am a Man of irrational aggression and behavior. [We've seen your rap sheet, we know.] **Eclaircise** -- To make clear; to clear up what is obscure or not understood In no way am I attempting to justify my actions towards persons of high immaturity levels and hypocritical methods of “becoming a better person,” I was wrong. My unexpected reaction to fallaciloquences embellished with deceitful humgruffin cover-ups and unnecessary remarks towards my younger brother enraged me. **Fallaciloquence** -- speaking deceitfully (Yes, notice the redundancy) // **Humgruffin** -- A terrible or repulsive person. I couldn’t seem to fathom how a immature nanocephalous adult raglan tailored ... **Nanocephalous** -- having a small or below average sized head // **raglan** a coat with sleeves that continue to the collar instead of having armhole seams ex-batman and a jean maillot wearing macrotus, labrose, **macrotus** -- A large-eared grayish bat (Macrotus californicus) of southern California and northwestern Mexico // **labrose** -- having thick lips [A large eared bat - but with 'purty' lips? Really, Ricky? I think your woodie is showing] kazachoc like dancing, woman beater callent could make such comments and pass judgment to an abuse victim.**Kazacho** -- Ukrainian folk dance? Really, Ricky? // **callent** a misspelling of either the french word caillent - clot, coagulate, or most likely callant -scottish word for lad, or boy [So, now we're at big eared folk dancing boy with a tiny head and also those dang 'purty' lips] At the moment I was infuriated. Please let my actions be as a lesson as what not to do. You must vastate yourself to aggression and search for other solutions before reacting. **Vastate** -- second-person plural present active imperative of vastō - to devastate, ravage or lay waste [I 'ravaged' myself to get rid of aggression - I called it masturbation. Is that what you mean? And yes, 'purty' lips started it all.] Threatening closet coward human beings only leads their tearful plea for restraining orders, desperate cries for help from “affiliating gang bangers”, and countless whiney excuses -I.E. “she hit me first!!” to the media and courts, which could possibly result unwanted circumstances. As for the once semi high powered homosexual perverts, molesters and child rapists of the Industry, I vaticinate justice will be brought to you on Judgment Day. **Vaticinate** -- to prophesy [...said the diminutive, convict wannabe gangster] I leave this to God though. Please except my apology, obviously knowing the message can always be heard if ears are around . Thank you." - Ricky Romance Fallaciloquence is actually quite appropriate for an 'apology' penned (or cut and pasted) which the speaker doesn't fully understand - which is deceitful, is it not? Here's a word Ricky (or Ricky's moronic PR person) - sesquipedalian. Uh, I'll save you the trouble, it means Given to or characterized by the use of long words; long and ponderous. But in everyday speak, poser, wannabe pretentious, loser asshole will do. Just FYI.

Guess who's stalking Chris Brown now?! Raz B's crazy-ass brother. SMDH

It's been said that mental illness runs in families ... Raz B! Come get your damn brother! Ricky Romance ups the crazy with the video below. If threatening to stick a pistol in Chris Brown's mouth if he ever catches him alone wasn't enough, now he's stalking Hollywood asking strangers if they've seen Chris Brown. SMDH... Mental illness is no joke. First off ... Raz and his crazy brother are fucking with the wrong Chris. They need to be stalking Chris Stokes with a video camera, let us all keep an eye on his nasty ass. Second, let's hope Chris Brown says DEUCES to this fool instead of doing another spoof. But seeing how well Chris restrains himself, we're sensing another comedy routine. Stay tuned .... NOTE to CHRIS: Think less comedy and more restraining order.

Breezzay!!! Where you at?!!!

Chris Brown escalates Raz B feud w/ vid spoof of Ricky Romance - "You softer than baby puppies!"

Is Breezy itching for trouble... or giving brilliant satire? *Sigh* LMAO! *Sigh* Chris' hard-core thug parody with an air of 'one false move and the puppy gets it!' is irresistable. Or maybe it's those kissable lips. Whatever. We said he was a clown, thats why we love him - passionately. This short vid clip where he poses as a luscious-lipped thug and threatening himself while holding a puppy and a fake gun proves his clown-ness is in full effect, and that he could stick us up for our candy any day or night of the week. Ah, feel the love from his fan-base rising like a morning erection. Clearly making light of the video (below) by Ricky Romance (who jumped into the twitter beef instigated by his brother Raz B) where he threated to roll up on Chris Brown and shove a pistol in his mouth, is Chris' way of taking the clown route. Is it ill-adviced? Yes. Is it kinda brilliant? Well, lets just say that the best satire is. Although he's giving Raz B and now Ricky Romance their much desired google hits. And hopefully Romance has the sense to find the parody of his foolishness funny. But with one who's dumb enough to produce the original threat vid in the first place (see Ricky's vid below), we never know deep the waters of his ignorance are. Stay tuned. However, Chris may have taken the matter to the comedic level necessary to defuse the whole faux-troversy, expose it as the absurd nonsense that it is, while making us all laugh in the process. Advice to Chris from a die-hard fan: Cute, extremely, brilliant even, (especially the candy shirt) but since some people don't have a sense of humor, let this go now. Please. But keep making your fan-base throb with delight. ~

Ricky Romance threatens Chris Brown