SGL Café

New House / Internet issue

Just a note to inform readers that due to the acquisition of a new house, the grueling renovation and all that, this website has been temporarily dormant. My apologies.

The internet should be up soon and we'll resume regular programming. 'Til then ....
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Jill Scott: Why feeling a 'twinge' over interracial couples doesn't make her racist

Grammy Award winning singer/actress, (star of Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Married, Too) Jill Scott has come under fire for her comments in an Essence interview where she takes on, and say some bashes, interracial couples: Essence.com: Jill Scott Talks Interracial Dating ...My new friend is handsome, African-American, intelligent and seemingly wealthy. He is an athlete, loves his momma, and is happily married to a White woman. I admit when I saw his wedding ring, I privately hoped. But something in me just knew he didn't marry a sister. Although my guess hit the mark, when my friend told me his wife was indeed Caucasian, I felt my spirit ...wince. I didn't immediately understand it. My face read happy for you. My body showed no reaction to my inner pinch, but the sting was there, quiet like a mosquito under a summer dress... Maybe she said something more overtly racist in another article to warrant being called a racist as the below CNN interview states. And maybe she's distinguishing "inter-racial love" (which, in the clip, she says she supports) as different from inter-racial relationships, though I don't see how anyone could parse such a distinction. My conclusion from what I listened to and read here is she's speaking from a painful, soul-sucking place of black women in the long history of America, and voicing that quiet twinge of "betrayal" that a lot of black women feel when they see a black man with a white women. As much as I like and respect fellow blogger friends who find her statement racist, I must disagree forcefully. It's all about acceptance, and it happens by degrees. A friend told me that the gay equality movement won't be fully successful until we get past what he called the Two Beats syndome. As out and proud as we may be, when we first making acquaintances or dialogue new co-workers, there is that moment when its time to make it clear. They may asks, "Do you have a girl?" And thats when many of us pause, just a second or two, before we either make it clear or skirt the question. Two beats to decide to be authentic or not. Historically, what Jill says is true. As an out and proud black gay man, I sometimes feel twinges: when I see inter-racial couples, when I see a black woman pushing a white baby in a stroller, when I kiss my man in public or hold his hand and display overt same sex affection. None of those twinges are ones I want to feel, but I do. We've come a long way, but we have much further to go. I think that's the dialogue Ms. Scott is inspiring, and I think its our sensitivity to these uncomfortable subjects that make us bristle at the thought of having negative reactions to couplings that we all know are as natural as breathing. Love is love, and its what Jill Scott sings about. And she's about to go on tour with Maxwell, so its doubtful she's homophobic either. I think we should applaud her to expressing things most people would rather we didn't talk about, as if ignoring the reality of having these little twinges, or pausing for two beats, will make the fact that we aren't there yet go away.

Roseanne was right about the Mormons and teen suicide, however tactless

Speaking the painful truth is never easy or popular. But let's get past Roseanne's possibly callous words (and dust up) about the suicide death of Marie Osmond's son. Let's talk about the real issue here, the one at the heart of the matter – teen suicide. According to SafeYouth.org: "Several state and national studies have found that gay, lesbian, and bisexual teens are more likely to seriously consider and attempt suicide than heterosexual teens. There are, unfortunately, not sufficient data to determine whether rates of death by suicide are similarly elevated. Why are gay, lesbian, and bisexual teens more likely to attempt suicide? The reasons for this are not entirely clear. Research suggests that discrimination due to the social stigmatization of homosexuality in our culture may have important mental health…" etc., etc.... This is about gay kids offing themselves. Whether or not Marie Osmond's kid is one of them is aside from the point, because the documented list of gay kids (or presumed gay) who opt for death is growing. The Mormon Church is most notable in this (although other religions are equally culpable) because of their well-documented, orchestrated, boots-on-the-ground, tireless campaign to demonize gay people and prevent them from participating in the institution of marriage. In this respect, the verdict is in and the jury has gone home already. Yet, they're still at it, giving awards to hate groups like NOM. While equality supporters are accused of Mormon (and Christian) bashing, in the real world we are defending our right to share this world on equal footing; to have our families receive the same recognition as their families, and not have our children denied admission to schools or carry the stigma and self-esteem-crushing burden that accompanies being singled out as different, unworthy, and destined to burn in Hell. Check out the difference between Christian bashing and gay bashing: They claim we oppress them. Yet, you don't see LGBT organizations forming (or funding) secretive orgs [like NOM] with the sole purpose of oppressing Mormons. That's their M.O., and that's why we fight back. We're fighting for our lives and our children's lives and that can hardly be seen as hateful, or vicious, and certainly not religious oppression. In the sixties the Mormon church didn't think much of Black people. All arguments against their separatist policies were deemed religious oppression. Imagine that. Roseanne poked a [middle] finger into the festering boil of religious dogma, and all the faithful flooded Queerty to yell "Ouch". But if they tended to their own sores, they'd be nothing to poke. End of story. Keeping speaking the truth, even when it hurts to do so.

Stress Sex ...

It's pathological with me, this reaction to stress. Dr. Phil would have a neat little explanation for it (which is why I hate his know-it-all ass), but still, like after 9/11 when I did some odd things in the search of comfort, whenever I feel major stress, I seek solace in sex. With the Jersey City Artist Tour almost here, I find myself distracted by every attractive guy in my orbit. Maybe it's the nature of the project (recreating DANCING WITH THE DEVIL and its dark erotic themes), but lately I flirt shamelessly like an alley cat in heat. Though that's not entirely unusual for me (I'm a flirt, its part of my charm), this time its different, this time I don't care who I hurt or offend. That's a very bad thing. Fortunately, a good friend from DC -- when I whined about my stress/sex connection -- gave me the best cut-to-the-chase advice ever: "Tell 'Little Taylor' to chill the fuck out and focus!" He's right. Thanx, Don. That's just what I'm gonna do. 3 days to go. Damn I'm horny. ~~ "Dancing..." on MySpace Press from across the pond ... "Dancing..." on ka-os | theory

In One Week ...

Yeah. I'm closer than you think. And I'm tired. Didn't get in 'til 3am, after spending the day in Trenton with Out IN Jersey editor Toby Grace - thrift store hopping for frames, then the arduous process of matting my prints for the Jersey City Artist Tour next week. Toby was a life saver, because the cost of doing what I'd planned had shot through the roof and my little wallet had developed a bad case of the shakes. So now, instead of spending $200 per print for the matting and custom frame, I spent a total of $25 bucks. They are not perfection, but at this point I don't have the strength to be anal about minor details. And truth be told, I don't give a damn about selling pictures - 'cause its all about the book. In one week. Remember that Obama speech 7 days before he was elected? It gave me chills. I'm running a revised version in my head now, 'cause in 7 days the first hurdle between DANCING WITH THE DEVIL and the film version will be cleared. And we'll keeping sprinting, leaping toward the finish line cuz its closer than you think. And for me, the goal is all that matters. Everything else is bullshit. ~

Featured Video ~~ Here's some fun from Team KLB - (to the beat of Lady Gaga)